I know this is not normal AT ALL for me but well, I attempted to do my work. I mentally prepared myself for it and was ready to face it (I sound like a kid going for her first kindergarten lesson or something. ANYWAYS) ... but, MLG is down. Do you have any idea how irritating that is? Very rarely do I actually want to do my homework and when times like that comes around, SOMETHING always goes wrong. This is unfair. Oh and I'm ignored on MSN whenever I'm scholarly and WANT to do my homework. This is UNFAIR. Yes, just plain U-N-F-A-I-R. Oh well, since I'm here I might as well tlak about some stuff. I suddenly have this urge to start writing. Well, not have diaries and talk about my nail polish colour and how my face felt hot when the guy at the mrt smiled at me that day. Like real stuff, no matter how random they can be. Stuff like photographs and music and even occasional stuff about god. I want to be able to express myself without fearing anyone judging me and making me feel out of place. I wanna have my freedom of speech and not have anyone tell me I'm just being stupid and that I'm a lost soul 'cos I'm a non-believer. I guess what Praba says is right, I do have a problem because I'm scared sometimes to say what I truly feel. I'm scared I might hurt other people's feelings so that's why sometimes I just give in to them. I just give up speaking for what I truly believe. I guess in ways like that you could say I'm just nice and sensitive ... or you could go a little further and say I'm a wimp or something. Anyways, right now I have no intention to do homework. I wanna feel like seeing the pictures Ruth took, I wanna see how alive they look. I wanna be able to look into their eyes and know what they're thinking. I know I'm sounding weirdly passionate about this but well, I just wanna see why Ruth, David, Myla and Pru find this a work or art and why the rest like Jane and Heliena and that stranger find it obscene. Ahhh. Oh well, I'll just go and read the acknowledgements part to see if I can dig out anything from it.

Oh well, I guess that'll remain a mystery and bug me ... until I find something else that will bug me and make me lose my precious sleep. Okay then, I guess I'm off. Wouldn't hurt to do some homework, too.